Against all odds, two hearts beat to the sound of different drummers.

Midwestern father Bill Collins considers how much less Phil Collins his son has heard at his age versus what he was subjected to. “Think about it, I was born William Collins in 1972,” said Collins (William). “My friends forever called me Bill Collins because of the non-stop blanket of Phil Collins we were immersed in when we were kids.”

Take Me Home

“Not just the solo stuff either, but the stupid puppet-fueled popularity of that shitty Genesis period. That should have been illegal, that shit. ‘Land of Confusion’, what is that shit? Shit, that’s what that shit is!”

Do You Remember?

The author is tempted to fill this article with as many song references as possible to illustrate how pervasive Collins was at the time. You would certainly recognize most of them. That’s all.

Every high school dance. Every awkward teenage party. Every afternoon foray into the mall. Every car radio controlled by your parents. “I got my first action slow-dancing to ‘In the Air Tonight,’ Collins (William) observed. “‘I could feel it coming in the air tonight!” Collins (William) laughed concerningly.

Kids today have it differently. The ravages of time and age have created an almost impenetrable fortress blocking a now 74-year-old man from getting any airplay. “You could say that any radio airplay is ‘against all odds!'” Collins (William) looked to this reported for validation and recognition of the reference. This reported offered him no reply at all.

Invisible Touch

When Bill Collins made a “Sussudio” reference to his child, the concerned look indicated that perhaps his child believed he was having a stroke or at least a new stutter. His “Don’t Lose My Number” joke to his child only elicited a response of, “Dad, phones have numbers programmed in now.”