Deity surprised of where they/them ranks in order of priorities on the side of suburban minivan.

“I used to be before the cats, at least,” laments deity. When asked for their name to ensure accuracy of the article, they replied, “Some people do call me Christ. I prefer they/them but you can call me us/all if you think that’d be more understood.” When it was answered that it was likely more confusing that way, they replied, “Yeah, ok, I get that. I’ve always liked the name Zabadu Sanchez. So just put that.”

When it was pointed out that Squeeky [sic] had apparently recently passed away, Christ/Sanchez was surprised. “I wasn’t aware that Squeeky [sic] had passed on to the next life. Maybe she harbors some resentment about that that changed the order? Humans are known to make some basic mistakes in the grieving process. That’s how I programmed them.”

“I will admit,” added Christ/Sanchez, “that I always hated Squeeky [sic] because of how his name was spelled, and that wasn’t even his fault. And now look where he is! Hint: not up here with me!”